I knew I was pregnant the moment I opened up the oven and the waft of roasting sunchokes had me running straight to the porcelain throne. The only time my body responds to smells like this is when I am pregnant. This event happened a week before a pregnancy test could even detect anything but just like an oh “too familiar” friend, I very well knew what was happening. Just like my other two pregnancies, the nausea continued well past 20 weeks and just as it was about to reside, acid reflux replaced it.
This pregnancy had been quite an uncomfortable one. I don’t believe my body had completely recovered from my last pregnancy which was wreaking havoc on my back, ribs and hips. Near the end of my third pregnancy, I was getting little to no sleep at all and just trying to manage to get through the day. In fact, I was so exhausted that I neglected to realize that I had come down with a cough until it was very severe. It wasn’t uncommon for me to wake up in the middle of the night with a coughing fit and the combination of acid reflux had me gasping for air and throwing up. I was also experiencing prodromal labor the last few weeks of my pregnancy. This false labor mixed into discomfort and wheezing coughing began to feel like torture.
The Saturday before my due date, we went out to one of my favorite places to eat as a family and walked the boardwalk on Alki Beach in hopes to spur on labor. That night I was awakened by prodromal labor which was typical for that time at night, but this time I couldn’t fall back asleep despite how desperate I had become. So at about 5:30 I gave up trying and drew myself a bath. Eric was clued in enough to believe that this might possibly be real and lit some candles while I tried my best to relax in the warm water. Much to my surprise this increased the intensity of my contractions and we decided to call my mother to give her a heads up to come on over. Unfortunately my labor stopped soon after she left for our house and as our two kids were waking up. This left me confused and bewildered. I thought that I would never go into labor! But my mom encouraged Eric and I to go for a walk to try to start labor back up again. After walking up and down the large hill nearby and around our neighborhood, my discouragement increased as nothing new was happening. Eventually after an hour or so back at home, I decided to lay down for a nap. After an hours nap, I woke up with the effort to resume my day as normal in hopes that perhaps labor would begin the next evening. I tried to prepare by keeping the house in order and even put together a small grocery list for Eric and sent him to the store with the kids. Not even an hour after he had left my contractions started back up but this time finally in full force. The wave of contractions were coming every few minutes and had me on my hands and knees swaying through them. I called Eric to let him know and we were soon on our way to Nancy, our midwife’s house. As we were driving, my labor stopped again and I felt even more discouraged. It was as if my contractions were afraid of their own shadow, just the mere mention of them and they’d shrink away! But as we arrived, Nancy greeted us with a big smile at her door and welcomed us in. She had soft music playing for us, had me lay back on the bed prepared for me where I could see the beautiful lake and feel the warmth of the sun. This was my third time delivering here and I always love how peaceful the environment is. I was no longer nervous or anxious, instead I was very present. I explained what was happening with my labor and Nancy was not unnerved at all and told me to relax and that she would see what she could do to help. As she checked my dilation, she manually dilated me from 4cm to 5cm. I had heard through a doula friend that she could do this but had never experienced it. It worked and my contractions started back up again but with less intensity.
Nancy moved Eric and I out into her lobby onto a couch where she keeps a TV and showed me her selection of movies to choose from. Nancy told me to pick one that I liked and that Eric would not under normal circumstances concede to watch with me! After a good laugh and rummaging through the pile, I decided on Young Victoria, a period romance film. Nancy must have been happy with my choice because we all watched it together. Eric and I on the couch and she sat in a chair nearby. Neither of us were really timing my contractions since I wasn’t in too much pain at this point and were just enjoying the film, well maybe everyone except Eric. After about an hour into the movie Nancy paused it and had me move back into the room to see how I was progressing. I was now dilated to 7cm and she decided to break my water bag. This instantly brought forth a roller coaster of intense contractions. She had me move back to the couch and said “let’s finish the movie, and then we’ll meet your baby!” Although she turned the movie on, I couldn’t mentally engage and was mainly on my knees rocking back and forth. There was about twenty minutes left in the film and I all I could really think about was how eager I was for the movie to end! Eventually it did and after checking me again, she said I was ready to push! Although I didn’t feel the urge to push yet, I was completely willing to comply. Nancy coached me through the entire thing; as soon as I felt a contraction I would let her know and she was right there with her gentle and confident instructions saying “ok, now push push Push! HOLD HOLD HOLD, Now Push!” After about 15 minutes of this I could feel the head, nobody had to tell me. The pressure was nearly unbearable and I was at my breaking point. I was in my own little world mentally so I don’t remember hearing them tell me, but I do remember saying out loud with some tears, “ok, you got this. You can do this!” I mustered up all my strength and just as a guttural groan escaped my lips, my baby came out in one fell swoop. Eric placed our precious baby girl onto my chest, the sweetest relief I had ever felt. She was pink and perfect. I was so exhausted and all I could do was smile with tears in my eyes. Beaming, I drew her in for a kiss and fell completely in love. Our beautiful baby girl was finally here! Another soul to love. For the following hour, the three of us cuddled together on the bed in a happy haze. Relaxed, receptive. With one last instruction from Nancy to Eric to “treat Shana like a queen,” we were on our way home. Our baby was ours to take home now.
Eric took this picture of me after we came home from our walk on Alki Beach.
Moments after Hazel was born
Pink Champagne and Pink Cupcakes at home to celebrate
The first few weeks with our little Hazel
